He said she said: what brings happiness

Dear Charlotte: I read your column often and find it very informative. I have lived in the US for over 52 years including my years at Antioch College and Columbia University and work experience in almost every state of the union. I don’t think I can count on my fingers more than one or two whom I would call a friend. That is the way it is in this great land of the likes of Walter Cronkite. And there are those Americans who, through their biased books and lectures, do not want Americans to be friends with Turks. Below are three book reviews out of many that I have tried to bring to the attention of Turkish-Americans to do something about, but no one seems to care as they look at us as a lost cause. Perhaps you could let me know what can be done to correct this situation. Regards, Y.O. (From New Jersey)

Space does not permit me to share all of Yuksel’s insights and comments. The three books she mentions in her letter are books that have each given the readers a false image of the Turks. Yuksel is correct in her observation that Muslim Turks find it more difficult than others to develop friendships in America.

Another Turkish female Today’s Zaman reader, M.T., who lives in California, has commented that although her neighbors speak Turkish they are Armenians and she finds that they do not trust her. Although there are Turks and they live closely to one another, she feels lonely because she is not accepted by them.

I enjoy hearing from Today’s Zaman readers around the world and from all over Turkey. Here is someone asking some real soul-searching questions.

Dear Charlotte: When I read the title of your article dated July 17th the first thing that came to my mind was the discrimination against the imam-hatip graduates in Turkey. This year from Konya, my hometown, the success of Konya Selçuklu Anatolia imam-hatip high school was amazing. Out of 230 students 229 were successful in the Student Selection Examination (ÖSS). However, they do not have the chance to study what they want. The only reason is that they did not graduate from a secular-based high school but a religious one. Education is always said to be the right of every human being. But does it still remain a right if one is not allowed to use it no matter how hard s/he tries? … Yes once there was a hope, and we all had dreams of our own. But we are not allowed to fulfill them. … Z (from Konya)

I would like to note that Z from Konya points out in her letter that it seems that people are equal, but it appears some should always be more equal.

Drop me a note and share your experience and comments on this topic.

We want to encourage Today’s Zaman readers to write and share your opinions, comments and thoughts with us. Here are some short email notes.

Dear Charlotte: I read your column called “Don’t give up.” It is really very nice. It inspired me. Thanks for your ideas. From: Ibrahim Ozbilge (Merter, İstanbul)

Dear Charlotte: It is a pleasure to read your column. This is all I want to say. Thank you. (From: Feyzi)

Dear Charlotte: This article, “Defining home,” has been written by Kathy Hamilton, one of the expats living in Turkey. There are many issues we would agree with her about living abroad and integrating into the new environment and socializing the strangers. I hope you will like it. Happy reading!!! From: Kudret Doğan

Usually when we hear the words “He said, she said,” we think it is a lover’s spat. What really brings happiness in life? Some of the readers who have written in have frankly shared how they feel: They are treated unequally and struggle making friends and achieving their goals because of others’ prejudices. I think everyone would like a sense of purpose, respect and the opportunity to achieve their goals.

What do you think?